One Week From Today

One week from today...  that's when you left.  One week from today...  that's when my heart shattered into millions of pieces.  One week from today...  that's when all the air was sucked out of my lungs.  One week from today....  that's when my life stopped.  That night standing in the kitchen has been forever seared in my heart.   I fight for every breath, my lungs don't want to breathe.  I fight for every beat of my heart because my heart does not want to beat.  Why would they?  TELL ME!!!!  WHY WOULD  THEY?!?!

To say I miss you is a joke!  There are no words to completely convey what my heart feels.  I love you so much Dodo...  I never imagined a life without my big brother in it.  But then I never imagined a life without my mother either. You were always there to help me through those times after Mom left.  You were my rock Pete.  Now my rock is gone and I'm sinking in mud that has an iron grip on me.   Please Dodo, please come back..................I know... I know.

Can't blame you for leaving...

I can't blame you for leaving, but it's still not fair. I don't know what to do, now that you're not here.   I don't know how to love, don't know how to feel anything but pain.   All I want is to have you back.  To have you healthy, laughing and the brother I remember.  If all I can do to keep you here with me, I'll remember you.  And when I don't know what to think,  I'll think about you.